Because Spanx Make the World Go … Flat

by Sammy in Comment — Updated January 10, 2020

Sometime a girl’s just gotta wear something tight. But hopefully … flattering.

So when I put on this Zara dress from the winter ‘06 collection, and I realized that it wasn’t AS flattering as it used to have been [a hem, muffin top …] I knew it was time to reach into my arsenal.

It was time to bring out the Spanx.

Actually, they weren’t really Spanx, but the cheap Target rip-off versions. I think that if I were to buy another pair, though, I’d buy the real deal – since the cheap Target rip-off versions are um, ripping.

But anyway, scroll down to see what those cheap, slightly durable, but always appreciated Spanx look like. It’s not pretty … but neither was bulge of skin below my belt before before putting them on.

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THE LOOK: Flat is the new Flattering

THE DRESS: Zara, winter ‘06 collection

THE NECKLACE: Gifted/consignment from my friend Kaitlyn

THE EARRINGS: Vintage 80s, stolen/borrowed from Mama D

THE BRACELET: I can’t remember if it’s vintage or gifted. Seems 80s to me, probably stolen/borrowed from Mama D

THE BELT: Portobello Road market, London, ‘06

THE FISHNETS: Gift from Mama D, Christmas ‘09, estimated origin: Marshals

THE SHOES: Payless, ‘08 [and I even encountered someone yesterday questioning the legitimacy of whether these were from Payless or not … ‘tis true]

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This belt reminds me of bondage/M&S. But … it’s really just a cool vintage belt from London. I promise.

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Great detail on this bracelet — and it doesn’t jangle and make obnoxious noise like a lot of my other 80s black/gold bangles do.

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This dress looks like it has an accompanying shrug, but it’s all one piece.

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There they are in, in all of their glory! Note how they are actually rolled up [no idea why I’d need them to knees] and are slightly see-through at the top. Ugh, cheap Target rip-off.

1 thought on “Because Spanx Make the World Go … Flat”

  1. Spanx has changed the way women dress and we can thank one person, Sara Blakely, who created Spanx by cutting up a pair of panty hose to create an undergarment to fight the dreaded VBL—Visible Panty Line. Growing from one women’s entrepreneurial dream, the Spanx shapewear line now includes Spanx panties, tummy control shapewear, Spanx hosiery, and new Spanx bras.
    Celebrities swear by Spanx and for good reason. The various Spanx styles smooth, shape, and can make you look 5-10 pounds slimmer. With styles that range from panties to thigh-length to footless pantyhose to full bodysuits, Spanx styles solve any fashion challenge we women have. Shape your waist, shape your thights, shape pretty much everything and do so in comfort that earlier girdle-wearing generations could have only dreamed about.

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