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Gratefulness Friday Giveaway: How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Gratefulness Friday Giveaway: How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

by Sammy 12 Comments


vintage fashion giveaway indie style society
**THIS GIVEAWAY HAS CLOSED! THANK YOU ALL FOR ENTERING!!!**

Hello and happy Gratefulness Friday Giveaway, vintage lovers!!

I can hardly believe that Thanksgiving has passed and we are full speed ahead into the holiday season! It’s December 2nd as I write these words, but in all honestly I still feel like I’m living the month of July!

But I suppose the old adage is true, right? Time flies when you’re having fun — and spreading vintage love!!

And let me tell you: There’s been a LOT of fun lately! From the latest video where I style Audrey of Sugar n’ Thunder in vintage to fun commentary on this ’60s Dr. Pepper ad on Facebook to the enlightening history of sequins, slips, Little Black Dresses and high-waisted pants …. there’s a ton of new vintage-how on the site RIGHT NOW, and I’m so glad you’re all checking in to learn & love vintage to inspire love of yourself and your personal style!

That’s what today’s Gratefulness Friday story is all about: Loving yourself, and doing so by not comparing yourself to others.

I have a feeling we can all relate to my story today — it’s human nature to adopt that competitive edge and judge ourselves against others. But what I’ve learned is that the act of comparison does nothing but make us feel bad and in a lot of ways, is actually counter-productive to accomplishing what we desire to do.

Today’s giveaway is thanks to Indie Style Society, an AMAZING Etsy store with showroom space in the heart of Brooklyn, New York City. Its founder Meghann also blogs on the Thrifty Fashionista and loves to Facebook, too.

Keep reading after the jump to learn how to enter today’s giveaway for a chance to win the prize pack from Indie Style Society pictured above, PLUS to read some inspiration on why you shouldn’t compare yourself to others today — and how to stop yourself COLD in a competitive moment!

The honest truth vintage lovers? I am probably the most competitive person I know!!

Whether you’re a friend or a follower here, you probably understand that setting yourself apart in the blogging world is a daunting task! I am constantly re-inventing my content so that it appeals to my audience and encourages them to return for more vintage know-how and style advice. Sometimes this brainstorming requires comparison to other bloggers and what they do for success.

But as you’ll read below, what I’ve learned is that there is no reason to compare ever. That all creativity can emerge without the feelings of insecurity born from the roots of comparison.

So today and everyday I’ll strive to be just me without desires to be someone else — because what I am and what I have is a unique blessing to me alone.

Today’s question to enter the giveaway asks you to reflect on those unique talents & traits you have too. I can’t wait to hear what special qualities you pride in yourself, vintage lovers!

The one thing we all share in common? Spreading vintage love!!! Thanks to all for continuing to light the flame of feel-good fashion and self-expression through vintage.

xx, SD

p.s. Thank you to CONTEST GIRL for promoting today’s giveaway!

 

I AM GRATEFUL FOR … NOT COMPARING MYSELF TO OTHERS

a heart cut out in a piece of toast

One of the easiest ways for me to inflict hatred upon myself is in the act of comparing myself to others.

I believe that this kind of fabricated competition is the same as self-hatred. Our discontent with that external “other” is devaluing who we are because that feeling of discontent is born from the root of insecurity.

It’s the ironic truth that when we compare ourselves to others, we create negativity that wasn’t previously there. When we choose to compare, we are choosing to feel “less” than we truly are. Our self-made “competition” is simply being who they are for themselves — not to inflict harm on us. The pain we feel in the comparison to them is the result of this decision to honestly make ourselves feel bad for no reason at all.

I was inspired to write this post because I often experience ebbs and flows of these self inflicted feelings of self-hatred and inadequacy. But what I’ve realized is that I have total control of not bringing this pain upon myself, because these insecurities are only turned on by my decisions alone and I have only myself to blame for them.

We decide to feel these thoughts of comparison — no one else is telling us to compare! We think, “If she has that, then why not me too?” and “How can he do that and I can’t?” I could go on and on but as a demonstration to you all, I will stop here because it is in stopping that I begin to feel good about myself again. Which is how we all wish to feel, right? Good!

We are all on our own paths in life — that is why I am here typing these words, and you are sitting at your computer reading them right now! Because we each have our unique skills, talents and capabilities to bless the world (and not to mention, ourselves!) there truly is NEVER a need for competitive comparison. Why compare when each of us in beautifully unique?

When we compare ourselves to others, we are also inflicting hatred on them, too. I’ve compared myself to people who have done nothing but great things for me.

Why would I want to compete with them? It is because my ego decides that the best use of my time is in feeling this insecurity. But my true self knows that there is no productivity in these thoughts, and that all they will do is lower my self confidence so that I cannot carry on the path of the perfection that is me. Comparison prevents me — you!! — from practicing our gifts.

It can be hard in that “pivot moment,” but when I decide not to compare myself to others, I’m not only boosting my confidence but my character, too. Refusing to allow ourselves to feel these emotions is an exclamation to ourselves that we have exactly what we need to do what we want to do. Thus, we won’t ever feel “held back” by the doings and accomplishments of others.

So how do you stop comparing yourself to others? Here’s a quick checklist to keep handy when you find yourself lingering in the shadows of self-hatred. Get out and into the light of self-love with a few quick reminders of just how great YOU are and why you never need to compare!

1.) You are beautifully unique.

Always remember this!! Repeat it every morning when you rise, when you switch activities and before you go to sleep at night. Let it ring in your mind like a sweet song. The more you remember, the less you’ll forget!

2.) Comparison will only make you feel bad.

As soon as you put that comparison cap on, you’re deciding in your mind to feel bad. You are the guilty one in the situation — the judge will put you behind bars for your self-hatred crime. So if your goal is to feel good, why are you choosing to compare and feel bad?

3.) Comparison yields no productivity.

This is a big one for me — when your mind is spinning round and round thinking thoughts of comparison, is really ever getting anywhere? No! You simply are fueling a self-driven vehicle of hatred. Jump out of the car now before you wind up right where you began: NOWHERE!

4.) Your “competition” has done nothing to harm you.

So love them! Instead of seeing them for what YOU aren’t, see them for what you both share! Recognize that just as you are beautifully unique, they are too. And celebration of their gifts will inspire them to celebrate yours (especially the ones you may have forgotten about in the midst of comparison!)

5.)  You can only be a better version of yourself, not a mirror of someone else.

When I feel that someone is doing something I want to do, I remind myself that I’m not on this planet to be someone else. I’m on this planet to be ME! So instead of focusing on the external which I cannot control, I switch my thoughts to focus on the internal of me, which are thoughts of feeling good in ways of loving self-improvement.

 

Give all others love and you will in fact be giving love to yourself, too.

xx, SD


WIN THIS VINTAGE PRIZE PACK FROM INDIE STYLE SOCIETY!

vintage fashion prize pack indie style society

Win this prize pack above from Indie Style Society by leaving a comment on today’s post that answers the question:

“Describe a talent/trait you are proud of that is completely unique to YOU (and requires no comparison to others’ because it makes you one-of-a-kind!)”


vintage silk novelty print scarf

(1) ’80s Scarf with Perfume Bottle Novelty Theme

vintage silk compact case

(1) 50’s Silk Cosmetic Case (this was her grandmothers!)

vintage pin

(1) ’80s Gold Circle Pin

vintage bow earrings

(1) pair of ’70s Gold Bow Earrings

 

HOW TO ENTER GRATEFULNESS GIVEAWAY #17

For a chance to win this vintage prize pack from Indie Style Society valued at $50, you must enter between today Friday, December 2nd and by midnight on Monday, December 5th.

You can only enter once, and all winners will be drawn at random using the site random.org. Winners will be announced by Wednesday, December 7th.

Answer the following question in the comment fields or Facebook comment fields below this contest post:


**“Describe a talent/trait you are proud of that is completely unique to YOU**

OTHER IMPORTANT RULES

**Entrants/Winners must be legal U.S. residents of the lower 48 states (not including Alaska and Hawaii) and at least 18 years old as of December 2nd, 2011

**For full contest rules and regulations can be found here

**All information submitted by contestants is subject to Sammy Davis Vintage’s privacy policy found here

 

SUPPORT VINTAGE SELLERS!

indie style society etsy logo

Sammy Davis Vintage Gratefulness Giveaways are made possible thanks to the generous donations of online vintage sellers.

To spread vintage love, I host these giveaways to not only introduce one lucky winner to the world of vintage, but to introduce all of you to an online seller with other vintage finds that you may want to give a happy home.

This week’s giveaway is thanks to Indie Style Society!

facebook site thrifty fashionista

Indie Style Society blogs and Facebooks! Check her out on Etsy and if you live in New York City, drop her an email to visit her showroom in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Please support the Gratefulness Giveaway sponsors by visiting their online shops and saying hello!


Thank you for supporting vintage sellers to spread vintage love!

HAPPY ENTERING & GOOD LUCK!!

 

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Comments

  1. Bre Dale says

    December 2, 2011 at 10:02 AM

    What a beautiful giveaway! I love this post. Great reminder!! I am proud that I am creative in so many ways. Sometimes I get frustrated that I can’t harness one of those talents in particular and just focus on it. But that’s what makes me special!

    Reply
  2. cindy b says

    December 2, 2011 at 10:10 AM

    I love that I have an amazing, positive attitude! :) Love the jewelry!!

    Reply
  3. Fajr | Stylish Thought says

    December 2, 2011 at 11:02 AM

    Couldn’t agree more! We all have unique talents and comparing ourselves is neither productive or beneficial to our self-worth. We all rock in our own way and need to honor that!

    On that note, I’m unique because of my passion for my dreams and my willingness to work hard to make them a reality! Go hard or go home!

    Love ya lady!

    Reply
  4. Mariz says

    December 2, 2011 at 12:52 PM

    I love the giveaways!

    I am unique because I don’t let other people’s perception define me. One is never too old to follow their passion. Now is always the right time to follow your dreams. The first step is always the hard part but if you don’t take that first step, you will always have that nagging question….what if?

    Thank you, Sammy!

    Reply
  5. Geordannah says

    December 2, 2011 at 10:51 PM

    I can completely design and engineer a costume in my head and then build it. I’m told this is a very unique talent, and I do know that I am very, very good at it!

    Reply
  6. Stacey Kay says

    December 3, 2011 at 8:52 AM

    *ability not available (haha!)

    Reply
  7. Denise T says

    December 3, 2011 at 10:22 AM

    Beautiful pieces!

    I consider my self to be extremely creative ranging from crafting to being the go to at work to figure out most things..Its nice to be appreciated for that creativity! =D

    Reply
  8. Nora says

    December 3, 2011 at 11:56 AM

    When I was young and had an idea, my father always told me “you don’t want to do that.” Consequently, many opportunities that were presented to me, I turned down because “I didn’t want to do that”.

    When I married, my husband was the opposite. He would get angry when I would say, “I can’t”. When we had children, he told them that the word “can’t” wouldn’t be used in our house.

    Slowly I began to do the things I never had done. I became active in community theatre. I learned to sew and began to do costuming. My already existing vintage collection began to grow and grow. It became a passion.

    I studied astrology intensely and became a professional astrologer. I began college at age 39 and got an associates degree in radio and television production. Later when we moved to Iowa, I drove 100 miles round trip to the University of South Dakota every day where I studied Professional Acting. When I auditoned for “Antigone”, the long time professor who was directing, stated that I had the greatest speaking voice he had heard in his career at USD. I discovered I had a talent for dialects.

    I could tell many other stories, but suffice it to say I am unique because I went from not “wanting” to do anything to wanting to do everything. I still have many “wants to do” at the age of 71. I was widowed at 50, but at 54 married another exceptional man who has supported my many “want to do’s”. He supports my search for vintage clothing to the point of renting three storage units to house my collection. Together, he and I have traveled to foreign countries, performed in plays, built a black box theatre in an old post office, and been active grandparents in our combined families. Even though I have had to deal with a lot if illness, I consider my life to have been fabulous, interesting and fulfilling. I “want” everyone to be brave and experience as much in their lives as possible. Never say “can’t”.

    Reply
  9. Melanie says

    December 4, 2011 at 10:01 PM

    What a fantastic giveaway with great items up for grabs :) Well everyone should have something to be proud of, and for me, it would be my ability to tell a story, whether that be through my musical instrument or with a pen on paper. Thanks again for the great giveaway!

    Reply
  10. Dana says

    December 5, 2011 at 7:22 PM

    I am grateful for my unique sense of humor. My friends think I’m completely ridiculous, but they are always laughing around me! I’m thankful for the ability to laugh uncontrollably and to make those closest to me do the same. =)

    Reply
  11. Laura says

    December 5, 2011 at 10:19 PM

    I have gifted eyes for color, and my life is a rainbow because of it!

    Reply
  12. Annie_VintageDiggs.com says

    December 13, 2011 at 12:02 AM

    Okay, I know this giveaway is over… but that isn’t even why I want to comment. This is one of the most honest and heart felt subjects and comments threads I’ve some across and this is something we all fall prey to. I’m unique in my ability to see the good in others, sometimes this gets me in trouble and I can be really let down when things do turn out the way they I think they should in my idealist mind. It’s hard not to compare ourselves to those around us when we feel we are struggling, but everyone has made so many wonderful points about why this just hurts us in the long run. I feel really inspired to lift up those around me for their good qualities and not fall into this trap, but rather to know how blessed I am to have them in my life!

    Thanks so much for this post!

    xoxo,
    annie

    Im hosting a VINTAGE DRESS GIVEAWAY on my blog, come by!
    http://vintagediggs.com/2011/12/holiday-vintage-dress-giveaway/

    Reply

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